Jun 21 2008
Just Getting Along?
by Jon Walker
I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought. 1 Corinthians 1:10 (NIV)
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The Bible doesn’t tell us “one anothers” to just get along with one another. Even the worst of enemies can bury their differences for a short time when it’s beneficial for meeting a mutual goal.
But God, sending a note through our big brother, Paul, calls us to a higher standard than just getting along: “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose” (Philippians 2:1-2 NIV).
Our testimonies are validated by how we get along with other believers – that is, how we get along with one another in our congregations, our small groups, our choir rehearsals, our deacon/elder meetings, not to mention our families. Jesus says, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35 NIV).
Yet, love doesn’t look much like love when it’s accompanied by arguments and disputes and constant fighting. My spiritual mentor, Steve Pettit, notes this is perhaps the hardest aspect of authentic Christian fellowship – because conflicts arise every time people are thrown together. Even a man and a woman who vow to love one another until “death do us part” can’t always see eye-to-eye.
It’s understandable, then, when a group of people who have nothing in common, except for the Jesus-life inside them, find it difficult to agree with one another all the time, perhaps even difficult to agree even one time.
What does this mean?
• Take your disputes to Jesus. We may have differing opinions, but on this one thing we must agree: Jesus is the head and his opinions are the only ones that matter (James 4:7). As we submit to Jesus, he will wash away our divisions and disputes with love that flows from the fountain of God.
• Agree to agree with Jesus. Has God brought to mind someone with whom you need to work out some differences? Instead of trying to make the other person agree with you, agree with God and submit to what God tells you to do. If God so leads, tell those on the other side of a conflict or dispute that you are willing to submit to the will of Jesus and encourage them to do the same.
Submitting to Jesus is only the begining. Allowing yourself to set aside self to listen for the answer and then follow through.
This is one of the greatest test of man and we are failing it on many levels. We should seek God’s perfect will, instead of our own will or someone else’s will. There is always a happy medium. We can get along, it just takes effort.
Sometimes it’s very hard when an arguement arrises. To think about submitting to the Will of God is far from the mind at the time an arguement is taking place. I know that while the arguement is taking place I should hold back on some of the things I want to say, because it will not only hurt the one I’m arguing with, it will make matters worse. I want so desperately to submit to the Will of God & let Jesus take control, but, I feel useless & unworthy of it. I know it’s because of the situation I am in here at home. I don’t want to feel like this anymore. I do want to submit to Jesus & do his will, I really do. I feel lost right now. Very lost. I know that Jesus’ way is the only way, it’s just getting there & allowing Him to take over. I feel lost right now.
I agree with T. Phyllisia, that we are failing on many levels. However I am blessed enough to have leaders/friends who understand some things about people and find ways to ‘get along’ and their own lives are better for it. Less stress, more friends, bigger lives. When I talk to some of these people they will have a line of thinking so mature and godly, the kind of thing that makes me go “wow, I never thought of it that way.” I beleive it should be a lifelong persuit of patience and understanding not to be taken lightly, like building a career. Always learning, always growing. I find with some people if you cant love them, you will just hate them! So choose life and love them. This makes my life easier.
We also need to speak the truth in love. Even Jesus had a righteous anger and overturned the tables in the temple. Some things are worthy of ‘fighting for’, like freedom, truth, justice, love/family. Sometimes, walking away and giving time/prayer helps, sometimes asking Jesus’ words be your words helps, but He will always help you when you ask for His help because he says ask and you shall receive, knock and it will be given to you (His wisdom), but if you keep reading, it says He will give it to us as long as we hold nothing against anyone else. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that it’s okay what they did, it just means that you give it to God to handle the situation. All of us are children of God and should be treated respectfully, but that doesn’t mean that we have to agree with everyone and not argue and that we have to ‘love’ everyone and the choices they make. And an argument doesn’t mean that we someone. We can have a difference of opinion as long as we abide to The Truth as it is written in the Bible and not put our own twists to it.
Dorothy, I pray for your encouragement. What you are looking for is a process that has to happen. The first thing I remember happening when I was yearning for God’s guidance as you seem to be is to have the awareness to look to Him when an argument arises. Pray for that first. Ask the Lord to make you aware of Him the instant you are in an argument. If you can do that, and God promises He will be there, then you have the advantage. But then you must submit to His guidance. The hardest part for me was remembering to turn to Him immediately. The rest then fell in to place, with time. Remember to give yourself time, the Lord is patient with you, and you need to be patient with yourself as well. Look at each time of change as a bit of growth and encourage yourself that the Lord is working in you. And here is a favorite saying I found in email……….
When I meditated on the word Guidance, I kept seeing “dance” at the end of the word. I remember reading that doing God’s will is a lot like dancing. When two people try to lead, nothing feels right. The movement doesn’t flow with the music, and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky. When one person realizes that, and lets the other lead, both bodies begin to flow with the music. One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back or by pressing Lightly in one direction or another. It’s as if two become one body, moving beautifully. The dance takes surrender, willingness, and attentiveness from one person and gentle guidance and skill from the other. My eyes drew back to the word Guidance. When I saw “G: I thought of God, followed by “u” and “i”. “God, “u” and “i” dance.”
God, you, and I dance. As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust that I would get guidance about my life. Once again, I became willing to let God lead. My prayer for you today is that God’s blessings and mercies be upon you on this day and everyday. May you abide in God as God abides in you. Dance together with God, trusting God to lead and to guide you through each season of your life. And I Hope You Dance